Dearly Beloved,
Grace and Peace to you.
         In Christ God was reconciling the world to God,
         not counting their trespasses against them.
         So we entreat you on behalf of Christ, be reconciled to God.
         For our sake God made Christ to be sin who knew no sin,
         so that in Christ we might become the righteousness of God.

                  —2 Corinthians 5.19, 20

The dark words, the slammed doors, the hastily packed
suitcase of looks and sentences, acid doubts,
blurry questions of guilt unspoken, unchecked,
the plea unanswered, the curse still burning,
the tangled silences, so much held back, such
passionate asking withheld, sorrow entombed in ice,
mishearing magnified by distance and memory,
the long, poisoned absence and its shadow,
the lost years, the nothing between you
that has become a something,
a wasteland, a long way to walk in regret,
the not knowing what you did wrong, and knowing,
the fine, inseparable mix of it being your fault and not,
your disappointment in both of you, the hidden,
unspeakable disappointment—
this is the unbridgeable gulf,
                                            so narrow, really, so thin,
the Beloved leaps into, and fills with all her being,
becomes the failure itself, becomes the gaping wound,
who all along has been your passion, your loneliness,
your unquenchable love seeking love,
so that there is no space at all, no separation.
Even in a distant land you re held.

Beyond the useless command to make things right
is her patient, simple plea
                                         to let it happen.

Deep Blessings,
Pastor Steve

Steve Garnaas-Holmes
Unfolding Light

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