Category: Reflections

Dearly Beloved,
Grace and Peace to you.
         
         
                  
God called Abram to leave the familiar and go,
go on a road he would make by going,
to a place he would know by finding.

Jesus led Nicodemus to the threshold of a birth,
a newness he could only know
by going through it.

Only what’s behind us, not ahead,
keeps us from going on, from entering
the impossible womb of starting new.

The stones of disappointment in your pockets,
the grave marker of the old life,
they can’t come with you.

The path is not a test. It’s our freedom.
Many a prisoner has looked into the tunnel,
the Beloved waiting in the light, and said no.

Where is the Spirit calling you, the wind blowing?
Where is the thin place between your habits
and a new birth?

These pangs, this heavy breathing:
the beloved is trying to birth you.
Let it happen.

Deep Blessings,
Pastor Steve

__________________
Steve Garnaas-Holmes
Unfolding Light
www.unfoldinglight.net

To receive Unfolding Light as a daily e-mail,
write to me at unfoldinglight8(at)hotmail.com

         
         
                  
God, like Nicodemus I come at night,
asking less than you answer:
you open an unseen door, invite me
on a farther path than I wanted.
Yet I want this, the confusing lead,
the bewildering invitation,
the dawning promise.
Help me to claim my want, to walk
in the daylight of my desire for you.
Open my heart even wider,
lead me even deeper, into the realm
beyond wisdom and control,
beyond the land of hanging on.
Let me be blown about by your Spirit,
flowing as your water, helpless
in your love.
Holy One, in my night I come to you.
Let your grace dawn upon me.

__________________
Steve Garnaas-Holmes
Unfolding Light
www.unfoldinglight.net

To receive Unfolding Light as a daily e-mail,
write to me at unfoldinglight8(at)hotmail.com

                  
1. Someone wants you. Conceived you. Is waiting.

2. There is a very thin boundary between you
         and what nourishes you, embeds you,
         becomes you.

3. There is no coming to life without pain,
         no awakening without surrender,
         no struggle without hope.

4. Through the valley of the shadow of death,
         Red Sea, gaping tomb, birth canal,
         life draws you, knowing.

5. Let the Beloved push you out of her
         into her lap. It is with love
         that she lets you go.

6. Breathe in. Breathe out.

7. Shed the sac of all the awful things.
         Let the cord of your shame and suffering be severed.
         Each breath, you are delivered
         into the new world.

8. Beneath the slime you are beautiful. You are new.
         Allow yourself, naked, flawed and bewildered,
         to be perfect, to be held, to be adored.

9. In this moment, the Holy One gives you life.
         The Holy One alone.
         Stay here.

10. Breathe in. Breathe out.

11. Each moment her sweet umbilical breath.
         Receive this life,
         and bear her love into this day.

12. Breathe in. Breathe out.

__________________
Steve Garnaas-Holmes
Unfolding Light
www.unfoldinglight.net

To receive Unfolding Light as a daily e-mail,
write to me at unfoldinglight8(at)hotmail.com

                  
                  
Beloved, come to me, I pray.
I do not care how or when,
in what form, what shape,
in what spirit you come to me,
but come.
I long for you.
I am not whole without you.
See, the place here in my heart
for you alone
I hold and wait.
Oh, come, do come, and stay.

So the Holy One
cries out to you:
Beloved, come.

__________________
Steve Garnaas-Holmes
Unfolding Light
www.unfoldinglight.net

To receive Unfolding Light as a daily e-mail,
write to me at unfoldinglight8(at)hotmail.com

Dearly Beloved,
Grace and Peace to you.

         
         
It’s not that unusual among desert stones
and jagged wastes where you are sure to falter,
the stripped, eroded places of your want,
to crave a little comfort.

To seek some mastery is not unnatural,
a perfectly reasonable illusion.
But there is only one hunger.

The body knows more than we want it to
of what we need, but not where to look.

A leopard in the city, beautiful, and ravenous.

Don’t be harsh with yourself.
Desire is as readily a path as a trap.
Befriend those temptations,
each one whispers a name of God.

You don’t need to be cold or closed,
but to want more than you have dared.
Teach the hunter where to seek,
how to not give up at the first delight,
and how to shoot you from the bow of desire.
Even if your hand trembles, and it will tremble,
your longing will save you.

For the Beloved also has desires,
and will draw you in,
if only you are desperate enough.

Deep Blessings,
Pastor Steve

__________________
Steve Garnaas-Holmes
Unfolding Light
www.unfoldinglight.net

To receive Unfolding Light as a daily e-mail,
write to me at unfoldinglight8(at)hotmail.com

         
         Jesus was led up by the Spirit into the wilderness
         to be tempted by the devil.
                  —Matthew 4.1

The devil’s not some red-suit guy
trying to trick me into doing evil.
I seem to do that quite well on my own.

No, these are the real temptations
of being human,
the things that lead me away from you, God:
the longing for power, security and belonging
elsewhere.

I confess these to you, God,
not to prove how bad I am,
but to see more clearly
how this works in me,
how my appetites can carry me away
from you.

I go into the wilderness
to expose my hungers,
to confront my distrust,
to renew my absolute dependence on you.

I won’t banish my temptations,
but welcome them, name them,
and let them become my path to you.

Beneath all that I want,
beyond all that I think I need,
is you.
I walk this desert journey
that you might transform my desires.

In this desert, God,
help me come to desire
nothing
but you.

__________________
Steve Garnaas-Holmes
Unfolding Light
www.unfoldinglight.net

To receive Unfolding Light as a daily e-mail,
write to me at unfoldinglight8(at)hotmail.com

Dearly Beloved,
Grace and Peace to you.

         
         
Not the great tragedies,
they have their own orchestra.

But the gentle tear in the fabric,
the best of intentions,
the dust of all this.
The empty glass,
the error, the wound,
the cross’ smaller shadow, finer grain.
A peg on the wall, coat on the floor.

Regret’s inescapable weight,
the sand in your shoe
of wrongs you’ve done,
broken china glued a dozen times,
a carved treasure box holding wreckage.
The grave in the pit of your heart
you come closer every day
to fitting exactly.

The lone bird, mistaken,
far, far over the wrong sea.
The world’s mosaic finished
with your piece still in your hand.

No words above the rectangle of dirt
in the grass, even the stone struck dumb.
The one who departs with your silence.

The child you raise imperfectly
to your cheek, apologizing
with such tender love and shame.

And every moment you spent weeping
on the bathroom floor.

Secretly you know
there will never be time to get this right.

You kiss the Beloved with lips of ash

who holds you and says,
“I know, darling.

I know.”

Deep Blessings,
Pastor Steve

__________________
Steve Garnaas-Holmes
Unfolding Light
www.unfoldinglight.net

To receive Unfolding Light as a daily e-mail,
write to me at unfoldinglight8(at)hotmail.com

Dearly Beloved,
Grace and Peace to you.
         
         
                  
Shrove Tuesday.
Supposed to use up all the fat,
get the desires of the flesh
out of the system,
get ready to get serious.

I’m not there.
I’m feeling: Really? Lent again?
Tomorrow the fasting and ashes?
I’m deep in the fat,
kind of liking the desires of the flesh.
I feel like sitting this one out.

Help me, Jesus.

OK, he says.
Spend this whole day being selfish.
Get God out of your mind.
Just you, on your own.
No holiness, no transcendence,
no courageous love.
Just fat and self-indulgence.
Don’t slack off. Make a day of it.
Wallow in your sorrow,
flaunt your depravity,
lose yourself in all that’s shallow and flimsy.
Let the cement of your despair set solid.

Then tomorrow tell me
if you’re ready for the long road
toward a new life.

Deep Blessings,
Pastor Steve

__________________
Steve Garnaas-Holmes
Unfolding Light
www.unfoldinglight.net

To receive Unfolding Light as a daily e-mail,
write to me at unfoldinglight8(at)hotmail.com

Dearly Beloved,
Grace and Peace to you.
         
          
Our oldest son and his wife are expecting a boy, our first grandchild, in early April. We’ve had a while now to get used to the idea. Of course Dan and Jill are getting ready for a lot more than an idea. Something’s about to radically change their lives.

Not long after the baby comes, Easter will come. Resurrection, too, is more than an idea. It radically changes our lives. But new life doesn’t just happen in a flash. It takes preparation. So starting Wednesday we have Lent: a time to get ready. The tradition of repentance and “giving up something for Lent” is not just some ancient vestige. In various forms the three great penitential disciplines—fasting and abstinence, prayer and meditation, and giving and service—help us to make room in our hearts for the new life that is coming.

Let his Lenten season be a time to confront your old life, the fearful, self-contained life you need to let go of. Practice letting go of all that and receiving new life from God. Be honest about the brokenness in your heart and in the world. Make an empty space for God to come in a new way. Whatever Lenten disciplines you choose for yourself, choose what helps you let go of old ways and receive new life.

The repentance of Lent is not a dreary, sorrowful duty. It’s full of possibility, like getting ready for a baby. New life is coming. You’re about to be raised from the dead. Get ready!

Deep Blessings,
Pastor Steve

__________________
Steve Garnaas-Holmes
Unfolding Light
www.unfoldinglight.net

To receive Unfolding Light as a daily e-mail,
write to me at unfoldinglight8(at)hotmail.com

Dearly Beloved,
Grace and Peace to you.
         
         This is my Son, the Beloved;
         with him I am well pleased;
         listen to him!
                  —Matthew 17.5

Jesus shows us the way of the cross,
but we back away.
We’re afraid of the loss and pain,
the sacrifice, the many forms of death
involved in the way of radical self-giving.
Just earlier Jesus said, “I’m going to my death.”
Of course Peter, our blabbermouth, objected.
But God says: Don’t worry. Look at Jesus,
with all the trustworthiness of scripture
and the hardiness of Moses and Elijah,
and shining with the light of resurrection
already radiating in him— isn’t he OK?
The way of the cross, of love amidst fear,
of entering the suffering of the world,
of confronting injustice at great cost,
this way will take you through dark places—
but look at the light with which you’ll shine.
Through all your suffering there is beauty.
Even though you go through death
you will burn with a heavenly light,
the light of my love for you,
the light of the rising dawn of Easter
already in you.
You won’t understand this
until after you’ve seen resurrection,
but I’m letting you know before hand.
Eventually you’ll know: Jesus seems crazy,
his way objectionable, his teaching absurd—
but it will light your way through the night.
Listen to him.

Deep Blessings,
Pastor Steve

__________________
Steve Garnaas-Holmes
Unfolding Light
www.unfoldinglight.net

To receive Unfolding Light as a daily e-mail,
write to me at unfoldinglight8(at)hotmail.com